We say so much, don’t we? While we say nothing at all that matters. We try for a while to communicate and then at some point we realize that one of us really doesn’t want to do so. That the individual desire supersedes the good of the whole. That we have not yet achieved the “blend” of life goals that we had so hoped to solidify together.
Most of the time it’s just bad fucking habits from weak and unbalanced relationships we’ve grown used to living with over the years. Sometimes we were the strong ones holding on…sometimes we were the accommodators to keep the peace. Either way, the teeter totter was not level and somebody was suffering. That’s not a win-win.
So here we are. What do we do to not perpetuate the same lame-ass, one-sided, ego-driven relationships that we’ve known in the past? How do you drop the bullshit? How do you learn to be fair, and respectful, and honor the new relationship and what you say you want it to be?
You communicate like a grown ass adult who knows what they want from life and is willing to stand for it against the pesky forces of inconvenience, and God forbid, a sense of confrontation momentarily while you explain your thoughts.
That’s how you build something new from the trash of the past. Not by perpetuating your old behavior, but by standing up in the strength of who and what you’ve decided to be instead of that life that made you so miserable, remember? That life that made you walk away from everything you knew and were comfortable with? The one that was so numbing you took great losses to begin again with a small flicker of hope?
Do you really want to keep repeating the behavior of a life you decided wasn’t worth keeping? Think about that.
While you find your words to communicate with the new life you’ve chosen.