So, my loves, I find myself at the pivotal point in dating where you start defining what will work and what will not. We’ve made it through the accelerated fire of the initial phase where all is perfect, magical and intense.
We’ve so far successfully passed the intrusion of reality and differences in communication styles that bring confusion, second thoughts, second guessing and the confabulation that naturally occurs with a lack of information.
We make shit up when we don’t know, don’t we? Communication must have dwindled to feeble and generic because I stumbled into some bad lighting, spoke a little too honestly, showed a little too much of my heart, or holy shit…
Maybe I’m not all that and a bag of chips after all.
I’m happy to say that while I did lock into “chick mode” for a short time, I snapped myself out of it and asked what I wanted to know. Then let it go to unfold as it would. We are both busy people with family, friends and work. I wouldn’t long be dating a guy who didn’t put his kids in the priority position. I wouldn’t respect or admire that at all.
It seems that even the most authoritative, confident communicators tend to falter a bit and struggle when it comes to their personal relationships. I get that. I used to hesitate plenty, edit too much and accept too little. Not any longer.
Life’s too short to bullshit and play games so I just say or ask what matters to me.
I love that he does the same, even when it’s hard to find the words. I love wrapping my arms around the intrusions of reality that I quietly waited for, wondering what would become of us then. Would he take the easy way and ghost? Guarding a potential treasure is hard work. A lot of us aren’t up to the task because we haven’t learned how rare it is to find like hearts and endless potential.
But some of us know this well, and hold the line.
This is what I can report of my findings thus far…when I see his face, whether it’s after 4 hours or 4 days and I ask him how he is, and he wraps me up, brings me close and just breathes me in…
It is still for me, perfect, magical and intense.
No matter what intrudes.