Driving home from my successful unicorn day, I was half singing along with the song “Scars To Your Beautiful” when I actually listened to the lyrics for the first time.
I had tears in my eyes the rest of the way home.
There are times it gives us comfort to know we are not alone in feeling less, in thinking we’re not good enough, pretty enough or smart enough to stand as we are and be worthy. The times we offer praise, support and affection to another as we silently acknowledge that we suffer the same wounds.
But there are moments when there is no comfort in that, we only know it hurts.
In my lifetime I’ve been ugly, plain, cute, thin, fluffy, and the girl with the hilarious personality. I learned to clean up pretty good at times as an adult, but to this day when someone says I’m beautiful I wonder what it is they see. Are they looking at my smile or the joy in it? Are they looking at my eyes or into them? Do they see the heart I offer or the body that carries it?
I wonder if you want me to look good on your arm, or feel loved in them?
These are the things we wonder, the things we want, the things we all feel. We have no control over our DNA. I have never been, nor will I ever be, centerfold material. But there is no other heart like mine, and I built that from scratch by making my own way. There is no other like it. It is beautiful.
So is yours.
That song broke my heart today. So, of course, I downloaded it to my playlist.
To remind myself that I am beautiful, no matter how you perceive me.
So. Are. You.