What if we quit making things so difficult and just loved each other? What would be so bad about just letting go of the bullshit and loving someone, and letting them love you back? These are the questions that keep me up at night. It astounds me that another human being would not welcome being loved. Why make it hard? Why throw in stupid labels and needless parameters that have nothing at all to do with one person loving another?
I guess the next set of questions would be, if someone does love us and we know it, why would we keep ourselves from treating them with anything but the utmost respect and loyalty? We all know how hard love is to come by. We all say we’re searching for it, long for it, would do anything to find it. Nine times out of ten, it’s right in front of us and we’re ignoring it because it might mean that we have to open our hearts to love someone…
And let them love us back.
What a frightening concept that seems to be. We ask ourselves, “where are all the good ones?” when the real question is “when will we be ready for the good ones?”. The love we seek is hiding from us because we couldn’t handle it right now. We haven’t grown enough yet. We still need to develop our strength and wisdom. If we are not whole and healthy, how in the world can we ask for such a person to come into our lives.
How many times have we heard that we attract what we are? SCARY THOUGHT. I don’t want that, I will tell you straight up. NO. You just let me be for right now, and I’ll grow into a woman the likes of which you have never seen. And those good ones will come out of the woodwork to stand in front of me and everything I ever thought I wanted will be there for me to choose because I am everything I am supposed to be.
If we’re not living, we’re dying. If we’re not growing, we’re stagnating.
It’s time to get over the fairy tale and sink our teeth into something that matters. There is no Prince Charming. There is no Cinderella. Those are just stories to make us see that sweeping ashes is bullshit, mean people suck and if you have balls you can have the life you want. That is all. It’s a guide, not a reality. It’s a lesson to be absorbed, not something crazy to expect out of another human being.
Ask yourself this. Do you really want the perfect person? How in the hell are you going to live up to that? Oh hell no. I don’t want to fake being some perfect woman all the time. Christ, how exhausting. I want someone real, with the guts and courage to be honest and the wisdom to WORK. IT. OUT.
Screw Prince Charming. Give me a person with a spine and attitude. Bring on the honesty and communication. No holding back on the crazy-eyed loyalty that comes from someone who truly has your back in any hard situation. Ground level, gut deep and ferocious.
Yeah, give me that.
If you can’t bring that game, baby…just stay home.
One thought on “Go Big, Or Stay At Home”
Shelly, this shows a depth of understanding about yourself and relationships. I can tell that you have grown a lot and I am so proud of you.
We can only work on ourselves…we cannot “fix” others. To look at ourselves and understand what we have to offer another, to continue our spiritual and emotional growth instead of looking at what does another have to offer me is showing real emotional maturity.
I love who you are. You have so much to offer in a relationship. Never sell yourself short. Never. Be all you can be and let others go who cannot appreciate you for the warm, loving person you are.