Today’s meditation was called “The Giver”. I call it loving action, or speaking without words.
When I listen to others I don’t hear words~I see them, and it always saddens me when someone says “I love you”, but their behavior or attitude is screaming at me that I am not loved and treasured at all. It saddens me even more to accept that I have done this to others.
It is important to me to be vigilant and build strength in my integrity of word, yes, but more so in everything I say without speaking. Am I doing because I love, or because I feel pressured, forced, or shamed into doing? Am I giving joyously because I can, or resentfully because I should? Am I saying I love you while I brush by on my way out, or stopping for a two-armed hug and smile in case it’s the last time we have the opportunity?
I see clearly now gifts that have always been in front of me that I am only now taking the time to treasure. These gifts are called moments, chances, opportunities to give, love, share, shine.
When I am angry, I have a chance to let it sink in long enough to find what it is I’m REALLY mad about. It’s never what I think it is, and when I figure it out I can repair and heal and build something better than before in my relationships.
When I am sad, and full of self-pity, I can accept that my own choices brought me right here to make better ones, instead of blaming somebody handy for making me so miserable.
I can quit being selfish with my time by listening well, hugging, doing kindnesses, setting a good example of what growing looks like instead of groaning. I mean, what in the world are we here for if we don’t have time to love people? That would really be a pointless existence, and I want no part of that.
When I die, I want everyone who shows up to be absolutely certain that I loved them most of all.
That’s giving.
Now let me go work on that.